Kate Spade Life & Legacy

It is the third anniversary of Kate Spade’s death, and this essay from the day she died came up on my time hop. She was such an important part of my formative years. This has been my go-to travel bag for the better part of the past decade and my third one just bit the dust. I’ve been carrying my wildly impractical Kate Spade Camera bag for the past month, and I revel in the conversation and connection it brings with other people that appreciate her whimsey. I bought a new bag on an adventure with my sister to kick off the opened ended ticket portion of my journey and she’s been on my heart and mind.

I hope someday that I play a part in something that makes other women feel as empowered, polished, and ready to tackle the world with style as she did. A cute kate has always made me feel like I could tackle anything. __________________________________________________________________________________________________
6/8/2018

Kate Spade has been my fashion/design spirit animal since high school English class when Mary Danielson-Perry's cherry red Sydney bag became the target of my first luxe lust. Although it wasn't the label or the prestige that drew me in, I was obsessed with the classic tailoring and cheer of the design, and the way Mary seemed to sparkle even more than usual when she carried it.

I've had a love affair with NYC my entire life. Kate Spade was the perfect, shiny, embodiment of all the things I loved there. We'd visit and I'd go home with stars in my eyes and dreams of going to NYU and becoming the type of fashionable New Yorker made famous by every classic NBC sitcom. When I went to tour the NYU campus, I hit the flagship store and ogled, then I snagged my very first bag. Granted, my first bag was a sweetly striped knock off Sam, purchased from a collapsible table on the street in Soho. It wasn't the real thing, but even a cheap imitation gave me the magic I wanted from New York.

My Aunt Elyssa Rosenberg, always the epitome of NYC Chic and independent female badassery, sent me my very first authentic Kate. Like the cool New Yorker she is, she hit the sample sale and scored this awkward country music fan a little black and white buffalo checked pencil bag for my birthday that I carried for well over a decade.

Kate has marked major accomplishments and milestones for my entire adult life. Michelle Fehr Nguyen gave me a business card holder for college graduation that I used for 5 different sets of business cards. When the original's seams finally waved the white flag, I retired it this year and replaced it with (shockingly) another Kate. Let's be real, I look like a friggin #sponsoredpost when I show up at the airport. I've purchased myself stationary for new jobs and home goods for my first house. Friends and colleagues have gotten Kate for weddings, babies, and just because. Kate herself hasn't designed any of the things I've been able to purchase as a working adult- but her aesthetic and its power are still there.

Kate girls are witty and whimsical and the appeal spans generations. My grandmother, mother, and both of my little sisters share my affinity for the sweet sassy brand. Kate's designs made you feel like a polished grown-up version of yourself. While not quite Target budget friendly, Kate is relatively affordable and approachable, especially since the factory stores opened. Kate's designs just made you feel like you were living your best life... but with an extra dash of quirky, classic, cheerful, vibrant fun.

Every woman that messaged me today about Kate's death has said something to me about how her products made them feel. They spoke of the memories celebrated and commemorated in a little nylon bag. They reminisced about the empowerment and grace they felt with their first pieces, and the accomplishment and pride marked with subsequent purchases. No one ever said anything about the status or luxury associated with acquiring Kate. Kate was for every modern girl, not the same status symbol or reach-goal like Louboutins or Chanel. It was never about the label, it was only the feelings. Kate made us feel invincible, special, and beautiful- like every woman should.

After reading dozens of memorial pieces in fashion magazines today, it struck me how many people admired, respected, and looked up to her. She was one of the original #girlboss goals of my generation. While I’m sad Andy lost his wife and Bea lost her mom- I’m truly devastated by the reminder that it’s not all rainbows and butterflies (and in Kate's case- stripes & polka dots) at the top. You can collect all the brass rings you’re supposed to reach for: husband, family, a career filled with awards and accolades, millions of dollars, the killer Park Avenue apartment- but it doesn’t mean anything if you don’t also prioritize your mental and emotional health. There are lots of rumors swirling about their marriage, finances, depression and alcohol abuse. In the end, it really doesn't matter what it is that pushes you over the edge. What matters is that there is an edge, and we should all be aware of where it is and the safe distance we need to keep from it.

There are so many hot-button issues these days, particularly regarding women's rights. We can fight about plenty there, but I think it's safe to say that women generally put their personal priorities last, especially working moms. If Kate's work taught us how to celebrate our accomplishments and personal victories, let's let her death teach us to celebrate ourselves through self-care. Work/Life Balance seems like a myth. Learning to put yourself first is a tough habit to form, and there will always be times when work and family will trump the gym or a therapy session in its many forms. Don't worry about what people will think or say, please do what you need to do to protect your physical and emotional health. And if you've done everything you can and buying the occasional bright shiny object doesn't keep the dark scary things at bay- National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255. #ripkatespade